Feeling too raw to mediate?
When a relationship breaks down, all the people involved have to go through the changes the split will cause. Practical steps need to be taken; steps involving important decisions that could have long term effects on people's lives. To enable this decision making process, the government insists that separating couples attempt using mediation when they cannot agree on the alternative family arrangements and how to split their finances. The benefits of mediation are well documented. They include: saving on legal fees, less stress on the couple and children, and control over the decisions reached.
However, the emotional upheaval from a separation, for either or both parties, can feel so raw that talking about practical issues in an environment designed to enable agreement is just too much to consider. This is one of the areas in which therapy can add value to the separation process. It provides a space where people can face their own emotions about what is happening and what's led to their current situation. Most importantly, it supports people in finding what they need to make the best of their future.
Exploring personal feelings around fairness, anger, revenge, power dynamics and so on, within a safe and confidential therapeutic relationship, could be just what's needed to clear the air and start to soothe that rawness. The therapy process allows the benefits of mediation to become a reality for the separating couple and their family.
For most, getting through the difficult, and often long, process of a separation without support is unimaginable. Good professional support is a great way to face what's happening and find the life transformations that one can hardly imagine during the early stages of a separation. Contact me or book a session if you want to use therapy as a stepping stone towards mediation.